Taking personal stock

So I'm turning 40 this year. I knew it was creeping up on me. I could even see the big 4 and the big 0 way up the road there, not quite as big as a mountain, but bigger than a Mack truck at least, standing there, facing me, waiting for me, calmly...patiently. And positive of my soon arrival.

Is it normal for women to take stock of everything as they pull into 40? I find myself doing exactly that lately. Luckily, I don't seem to feel like a person who looks back on her life and where she is now and fills with regret. I like my life. Sure, I've made mistakes in the past, but I've come to terms with them. I try now to look ahead.

I have had my share of both comedy and tragedy, love and joy, sorrow and pain, and it's been an incredible roller coaster ride this far. I look forward to what's next. I don't fear it.

But sometimes, in the evening, I'll find myself standing in front of the full length mirror before I go in the shower, and wonder what the hell happened.

I try to look at my body as a reminder of some of the most important events in my life. And although it's no model's figure (not even in the same ballpark), it could be worse. The thin, smooth body of my youth is long gone. It's been replaced with a curvy, somwhat plump body that sometimes I like, and sometimes I'm really unhappy with.

I'm glad I finally grew breasts! LOL That took a while. I recall a female co-worker once describing my decolletage as "two raisins on a cookie." LOL But two pregnancies have scarred them with stretch marks, to match the ones on my lower abdomen and thighs. And lucky me, I inherited cellulite from mom. Thanks, Mom.

My first tattoo, which I had gotten as an act of rebellion at the age of 18 was once a small rose, but childbearing has stretched it into a blurry, colorful mess, twice its original size. Ah well. The other two tattoos I got simply because I liked them.

As for the rest....well, things could stand to be a little tighter, especially through the belly and thighs. And a little smoother in other places. My very least favorite parts have to be my upper arms and my back. The latter is so scarred from childhood chicken pox and teen acne, that I hate to wear a bathing suit. A backless dress is out of the question.

But I love my hair (most of the time) and I've always taken good care of my skin and teeth.

So in all, not too bad. Could be better, and like I said, could be worse.

I like the woman I've become. We'll see how it is when I'm 50.