Kathie died Friday. It was a gorgeous autumn day, with blue skies and sunshine. I don't know what the weather had been like in Las Vegas that day, but I hope it was just as nice.
Thursday night, we'd had a big storm. I awoke around midnight to rain against the window panes, and thunder booming overhead. My husband was awake next to me, and he put a hand on my hip, as I watched lightening flash, lighting up the sky outside our windows. I don't know if he was in need of comfort or if he thought I was. We both love storms, the bigger the better. I know, it's easy to enjoy them from the comfort of your own warm bed. You're right. It is.
We'd had bad weather the whole week. It had been dreary and drizzly for days. That bg storm brought an end to it, and brought the sun's warmth in its wake.
My husband had called me several times at work that morning. He'd been doing that more lately, I think for reassurance, knowing his mother's time with us was shortening each day. He called me around lunch time, as I was settling in to a salad. Kathie had died.
Even though we knew this day was coming, it was still a shock, which surprised me. I had no sooner put down the phone, my salad now forgotten, and I completely broke down. I went into the back room at work and cried like a baby.
I came home then, and washed dishes, made a pot of coffee, swept the floor. And then I cried some more. I didn't just cry, I wailed...loud and long.
I'll finish this later. That's enough for now.
Sunday, October 14, 2007
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2 comments:
Dear Ann, I'm so sorry for your loss. There are no words that will give you the comfort you need now, so cling to your husband and children. The closeness of loved ones will carry you through the worst of your grief.
Kathie may be gone in body but she will always be with you in spirit. She will never die in your heart. Try to take some consolation in knowing that she is no longer suffering.
With my deepest sympathy, Merry
Oh, Ann. I'm so sorry. Annielee's right, there are no words that will help, no comfort that can truly be given. We grieve, and we mourn, and eventually we learn that we move on. Life doesn't let us stand still for too long.
She's with you still, you know. Watch for the signs and don't discount them too quickly. They'll there for you to see.
Love and hugs,
Mad
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